Healing The Trauma of Narcissistic Abuse
As a trauma therapist, I’ve had the honor of working with many individuals who have found themselves lost in the aftermath of a narcissistically abusive relationship.
The aftermath certainly leaves a mark, as these relationships are full of devaluing, gaslighting, and destabilizing. After the fact, the victims are left feeling uncertain of themselves, and it often takes a while to unravel the memories and see them clearly so that they can be reprocessed more productively.
These relationships don’t always leave bruises you can see (though some do!).
Instead, they leave people questioning their sanity, feeling confused, and disconnected from who they once were. You may find yourself asking: “Why do I feel so broken when they never hit me?” or “What if they’re right and I am just too sensitive?” or “How could I miss someone who treated me so badly?” These are questions I hear all the time. They’re not signs of weakness—they’re signs of trauma.
When you’ve been in a relationship with someone narcissistic, it often doesn’t feel like a “normal” breakup. There’s usually a long period of charm and intensity at the beginning—what many describe as love-bombing—followed by a slow, painful unraveling. The devaluation begins subtly. A cutting remark here. A dismissive look there. Then gaslighting creeps in. You’re told you’re too sensitive. That you’re imagining things. That it’s your fault. And little by little, your confidence and clarity start to erode.
Therapy for this kind of experience isn’t one-size-fits-all.
What’s most important is creating a space that feels safe and nonjudgmental, where you can begin to sort through the fog. I often incorporate EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) into this work. It can be incredibly helpful in releasing the stuck memories and emotions that linger from moments of manipulation, fear, or emotional abandonment. EMDR helps the brain file away traumatic experiences that have never been fully processed, so they stop feeling like they’re happening in the present.
Sometimes we also work with what’s called “parts work”—an approach that helps you understand the different versions of yourself that may have developed to survive the abuse. Maybe there’s a part of you that constantly walks on eggshells. Or a part that still longs for the good times. Or a part that feels ashamed. These parts aren’t broken. They’ve been doing their best to protect you. Therapy helps you understand them with compassion, and eventually begin to lead your life from a calmer, more integrated place.
We also may (and often do) have to do attachment work and start at the beginning.
The abuse is NOT your fault. However, there may be some early childhood programming that made you more susceptible to this type of relationship. It’s crucial to do this work and develop a deeper understanding in order to avoid attracting another narcissistic individual.
One of the most powerful pieces of healing is learning to trust yourself again. Narcissistic abuse creates a disconnect from your own instincts and feelings. So in therapy, we slow things down. We explore your experiences without judgment. We talk about boundaries—not just how to set them, but how to feel safe enough to enforce them. We name what happened. We rebuild your sense of self, piece by piece.
So if you’re reading this and wondering if what you went through “counts,” I want you to know: it does. You are not overreacting. You are not alone. And no, you are not crazy. You survived something incredibly painful—and you don’t have to carry it alone anymore.
Start Trauma Treatment in Palm Beach County, FL
If you’re struggling with the aftermath of narcissistic abuse, you don’t have to face it alone. Our compassionate trauma therapists are here to help you heal, rebuild your confidence, and restore your sense of self. You can start therapy with Mangrove Therapy Group by following these simple steps:
- Contact Mangrove Therapy Group
- Meet with a caring, skilled therapist
- Start finding trust in yourself again!
Other Services Offered with Mangrove Therapy Group
Trauma therapy is just one piece of the healing puzzle, and our therapists are trained to support you through so much more. Our Delray Beach, FL office also offers care for:
- EMDR therapy, PTSD, and Complex PTSD
- Substance use and process addictions
- Eating disorders and body image concerns
- Grief, loss, anxiety, depression, and self-esteem challenges
- Anger, shame, and emotional dysregulation
- “Failure to Launch” issues and life transitions
- CBT and DBT-based support
If you’re ready, we’re here. You can learn more from our blog or FAQs page today!