So, What is EMDR Actually Like? Real Client Perspectives on Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing Therapy

If you’ve ever heard of EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) Therapy, you might wonder what the actual experience is like. While research supports its significant effectiveness in resolving psychological issues that are rooted in trauma and distressing experiences, the process itself can seem pretty strange and mysterious for many people who are not familiar. Some think it’s some torturous process where your emotional guts are ripped out as you re-live traumatic events. Others have the impression that it’s some pseudoscience “woo woo” technique that doesn’t actually work. Let’s demystify it in this blog and give you a sense of what an EMDR session actually feels like.

What is EMDR?

Okay, first let’s talk about EMDR and it’s theoretical underpinnings. EMDR Therapy is based on the idea that a person’s psychological and emotional challenges are the result of insufficiently-processed, maladaptively-stored, negative experiences from the past. Essentially, when an experience is overwhelming beyond the point of a person’s ability to cope with and process at the time, some or all of the experience gets stuck and stored in the brain, sometimes indefinitely. This disturbing psychological material accumulates inside of a person leading to them being easily triggered, having long-lasting patterns of negative behaviors and emotional overreactions, and so forth. So, in the course of EMDR therapy, you and your clinician work to figure out and identify what disturbing events are at the root of your issue, then make plans to reprocess them. Disturbing memories that are identified in your EMDR treatment plan are reprocessed using various forms of bilateral stimulation (eye movements, bilateral tapping, or bilateral audio tones) leading to a improvement of symptoms and resolution of your issues.

A psychologist in California named Dr. Francine Shapiro discovered, by happenstance one day, that thinking about a distressing memory while moving one’s eyes back and forth produced a sort of metabolizing or neutralizing of the original memory. From that miraculous discovery, she helped develop EMDR to what it is today. While it may be considered a nontraditional therapy approach, it is certainly not some pseudoscience mumbo jumbo. EMDR is considered an evidenced-based psychotherapy approach backed by tons of empirical research and endorsed by numerous health organizations around the world (such as the World Health Organization (WHO), The Veterans Administration (VA), The Department of Defense, and many others) as an effective treatment for trauma.

Can I Handle It?

So, let’s first take the opportunity to dispel a common myth that EMDR is like a medieval torture device where traumatic memories are totally relived and re-experienced. This inappropriately has the chance of scaring people away and therefore preventing them from having the healing experience they need to get past their issues.

The truth is that, yes, most clients have to experience some degree of discomfort. It can be hard work for sure! For those who think EMDR is like a magic wand where traumatic memories can be disappeared in total, blissful comfort - this is just not true. Unfortunately, there is no getting around having to feel some of the emotions and sensations that are encapsulated in these memories. It is just a part of life and healing that we have to move through feelings to get past them.

BUT! A skilled EMDR therapist will have the training and experience to first develop a sense of safety and trust. They will use techniques to keep you in your emotional window of tolerance, ensure you are adequately grounded and stable with enough relaxation and emotional management tools to draw from, while making sure the pace of therapy is appropriate and effective. This all helps clients manage strong emotions contained within some yucky memories. But once you are on a roll, you may be amazed at how fast and powerful EMDR can be at resolving your symptoms and issues. 

Click here to read about feeling feelings in trauma therapy.

Click here to read a past blog we wrote on the importance of pacing in trauma therapy.  

The Experience: A Rollercoaster of Thoughts and Emotions (But in a Good Way)

Many people report feeling like they are moving through a series of emotions, body sensations, and thoughts as their brain makes new connections. Some sessions bring unexpected memories or insights to the surface, while others feel like a gradual ‘fading’ of distress. Others describe a dream-like state where the memory shifts, changes, and becomes less intense.

After multiple sessions, many clients report that previously triggering memories feel more distant, less vivid, and like looking at an old photograph rather than re-experiencing the event. Experiences often feel neutral, no longer personal, and as if I’m looking at an old memory from the view of an adult (versus seeing the memory as if it’s still happening as a kid). The goal of EMDR isn’t to erase what happened but to help you see it from a new, less distressing, and more adaptive perspective.

Click here for an article where author, Bassey Ikpi, writes about her experience doing an EMDR intensive session. 

Here's What Some Mangrove Therapy Group Clients Have to Say

I asked members of our therapy team to get exact quotes from some clients on their experience with EMDR. Here’s what they said:

Clients of Brian Drennen, LCSW, CAP:

“It has been an awakening of parts of myself and emotions I did not have before. These parts are the good emotions, no longer the bad ones.”

and...

“I have been going to therapy for 20 years and never have I had a breakthrough like this.”

Clients of Ashley Zarmanian, LMHC:

“EMDR therapy really took my healing to the next level. After losing my mother, I experienced a lot of trauma and grief around her passing. I have done traditional therapy as well as other healing modalities but EMDR was different and far more effective for me. [My therapist] was able to bring me back to those painful and hard memories which caused me immense stress and anxiety, and with EMDR I was able recreate a new narrative which made sense and brought me peace. It’s been well over a few months and when I revisit the trauma, it’s with a newly gained perspective and I’m so grateful.”

and...

“After a really bad panic attack, I did 2 EMDR sessions. The interesting part is, my flight anxiety went down significantly (I haven’t had a panic attack while flying since) and my driving anxiety is a little more manageable.”

Client of Amber Zalman, LCSW, MS:

“It helped me to change what I’ve always been doing. I have a life now and the most clean time I’ve ever had.” 

Clients of Brian Gong, LMHC, CAP:

“My experience with EMDR was particularly evolutionary for me because it took my feelings about a certain traumatic event and allowed me to see it from a much bigger perspective. I was looking at the problem from a bird’s eye view. I had thought it was my fault as a kid, but now I realize I should never have been in that situation in the first place!”

and...

“You know how when you have a wound on your arm and your body just knows how to heal it? Well, your body knows how to heal the mental wounds you have too… It’s just you have to relax your conscious mind to do it. That’s what EMDR does. You put your conscious mind on this calming back and forth that engages and relaxes you just enough so that your subconscious can reprocess each wound you have. One by one, it heals you. Memory by memory, you move through and past each wound. And eventually, there are no wounds left. The relief from that healing has been the biggest in my life.”

and...

“EMDR helped me realize that my girlfriend’s behavior is not a reflection of me not being good enough. It still hurts but it just doesn’t feel so personal anymore which is great.”

and...

“EMDR allows me to relive my experiences without reliving the pain associated with them. My trauma is part of me but no longer defines me or the way in which I live. It has given me freedom which is priceless.”

Start Working with An EMDR Therapist in Palm Beach County, FL 

If you're curious about working with an EMDR therapist in Palm Beach County, FL, we're here to help. Our office is in east Delray Beach but we are just around the corner from Boca Raton (only 1.5 miles to the Boca Raton border!). Reach out to our team today to schedule a consultation and take the next step toward healing and freedom. Start your therapy journey with Mangrove Therapy Group by following these simple steps:

• Contact Mangrove Therapy Group
• Meet with a caring therapist
• Start addressing the symptoms that affect you most!

Other Services Offered with Mangrove Therapy Group

EMDR therapy isn’t the only service our team offers. Mangrove Therapy Group is happy to offer support with mental health concerns, including trauma and PTSD/C-PTSD, substance use disorders, eating disorders, body image issues, anger management, anxiety, low self-esteem, personality disorders, and much more. Please feel free to learn more about how we can support you. We also offer support with addictions such as process addictions, grief and loss, “Failure to Launch” syndrome, CBT, and DBT. Feel free to learn more by visiting our blog or FAQ page today.